Well things are getting easier as promised by others that have been there before me, I'm thankful to Father for that. I've also learned that for me there is a pattern of sorts at the moment; I'll have a few good days or so, then the sadness will settle for a time and I'll need the release of tears. I'll remember my baby and how he left me, and it will hurt for a while. I'll cry and Will comforts me and then I'm ok again for a while longer.
Just lately though I've become more aware of my empty uterus, my baby is gone and I'm waiting for my next blessing still. I've had my first period since the baby went, that was tough but a relief. It came earlier than expected, but I'm grateful for this as it will make dating the next pregnancy easier and I didn't have to wait as long as I thought to start getting back to normal. I'm not too good at waiting so this worked out well and I'm grateful to God that the wait was short this time. Now I just have to wait for ovulation, etc!
There seems to be so many lovely pregnant bellies around right now and its lovely to see, but it makes me feel so much more empty at times. I don't know how long I will have to wait for God to fill that void again...not too long I hope, but I trust him still for his good and perfect time.
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